What Sesame Street has taught me :

Maybe the hugs and we exchange with people, whether they be of the same sex or not, whether they be romantic or platonic or not, whether or not they are intended to be exchanges of love or friendship, maybe these kisses and hugs and holding of hands are supposed to be exactly what they are - vital instances of human contact that help us see life through.

Elmo is the epitome of this kind of love, the pure embodiment of pure love towards others - and he loves all over other people all the time, whether it be with hugs or words. I want to be more like him, more like this little red monster that reminds me that everyone has the capacity to love and be loved.

"I go around talking to kids around the country and around the world, saying, 'If everybody else your age is doing something very different than what you're doing, there's always going to be someone saying to you that you might not succeed with it, you might not make any money with that. There's always going to be some type of obstacle in the way. All of those things will go away if you really focus on what makes you happy."


- Kevin Clash, voice of Elmo

Let it be :

“Eve was not taken from Adam‘s head to top him, neither out of his feet to be trampled by him, but out of his side to be equal with him, under his arm to be protected by him, and near his heart to be loved by him.“


- Matthew Henry

"Nowhere to go but the heart."


- Rumi

"Why think about that when all the golden land's ahead of you and all kinds of unforeseen events wait lurking to surprise you and make you glad you're alive to see?"


- Jack Kerouac

"Boys and girls in America have such a sad time together; sophistication demands that they submit to sex immediately without proper preliminary talk. Not courting talk - real straight talk about souls, for life is holy and every moment is precious."


- Jack Keroauc

Pride & Prejudice :

“I declare after all there is no enjoyment like reading! How much sooner one tires of any thing than of a book! -- When I have a house of my own, I shall be miserable if I have not an excellent library.” 


“I must learn to be content with being happier than I deserve.” 


“I have not the pleasure of understanding you.” 


“Laugh as much as you choose, but you will not laugh me out of my opinion.” 


“We all know him to be a proud, unpleasant sort of man; but this would be nothing if you really liked him.” 


“I am the happiest creature in the world. Perhaps other people have said so before, but not one with such justice. I am happier even than Jane; she only smiles, I laugh.” 


“Till this moment I never knew myself.” 


“Do not give way to useless alarm; though it is right to be prepared for the worst, there is no occasion to look on it as certain.” 


“But people themselves alter so much, that there is something new to be observed in them for ever.” 


“The distance is nothing when one has a motive.” 


“They walked on, without knowing in what direction. There was too much to be thought, and felt, and said, for attention to any other objects.” 


“Do not consider me now as an elegant female intending to plague you, but as a rational creature speaking the truth from her heart.” 


“Have a little compassion on my nerves. You tear them to pieces.” 


"She was convinced that she could have been happy with him, when it was no longer likely they should meet."


“In vain have I struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you.” 

So

LET GO

(Let go)

JUMP IN

Oh, well, whatcha waiting for?

It's alright

'Cause there's

BEAUTY

in the

B

R

E

A

K

down 

So

LET GO

(Let Go)

JUST GET IN

Oh, it's so amazing here!

It's alright

'Cause there's

BEAUTY

in the

B

R

E

A

K

down

Ghazal 314 :

You who are not kept anxiously awake for love's sake, sleep on.
In restless search for that river, we hurry along;
you whose heart such anxiety has not disturbed, sleep on.
Love's place is out beyond the many separate sects;
since you love choosing and excluding, sleep on.
Love's dawn cup is our sunrise, his dusk our supper;
you whose longing is for sweets and whose passion is for supper, sleep on.
In search of the philosopher's stone, we are melting like copper;
you whose philosopher's stone is cushion and pillow, sleep on.
I have abandoned hope for my brain and head; you who wish for
a clear head and fresh brain, sleep on.
I have torn speech like a tattered robe and let words go;
you who are still dressed in your clothes, sleep on.

- Rumi

Translated by Jack Marshall
Arabian Nights Coffeehouse Press, October 1986

"When I first heard this song, relationships made a lot more sense to me. It doesn't talk about their feelings, about all those romantic things that people say in the first couple months: It's about two people just genuinely enjoying the presence of one another, and they both know full-well how they feel about one another. That's the healthiest relationship possible."


- Molly

"There’s joy in my heart: I have joined my lover tonight; / Finally free from the pain of our parting tonight. / As I dance with my lover I pray, oh Lord, in my heart: / May the keys to morning be lost forever tonight."


- Rumi 

“I have found nothing half so good
As my long-planned half solitude,
Where I can sit up half the night
With some friend that has the wit
Not to allow his looks to tell
When I am unintelligible.”


- W.B. Yeats

Peace out :

I walked out of class today. I did not feel victorious; this is, however, one step closer to standing up for myself than any other academic instance I've encountered.

 "You are so young, so before all beginning, and I want to beg you, as much as I can, dear sir, to be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and to try to love the questions themselves like locked rooms and like books that are written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer."


- Rainer Maria Rilke

Beatles :

If I fell in love with you
Would you promise to be true
And help me
Understand
'Cause I've been in love before
And I found that love was more
Than just
Holding hands

If I give my heart
To you
I must be sure
From the very start
That you
Would love me more than her

If I trust in you
Oh please
Don't run and hide
If I love you too
Oh please
Don't hurt my pride like her

'Cause I couldn't stand the pain
And I
Would be sad
If I knew love was in vain

So I hope you see
That I
Would love to love you
And that she
Will cry
When she learns we are two

'Cause I couldn't stand the pain
And I
Would be sad
If our new love was in vain

So I hope you see
That I
Would love to love you
And that she will cry
When she learns we are two

If I fell in love with you... 

Poetry :

I've been reading and writing and reading and writing and ready to write and ready to read so much lately.

I think I will become a poet. I think I have come to possess a poet's heart.

Las poemas de Pablo Neruda son más preciosas y peligrosas en la noche que en el día.

When you are old

by William Butler Yeats

When you are old and grey and full of sleep,
And nodding by the fire, take down this book,
And slowly read, and dream of the soft look
Your eyes had once, and of their shadows deep;

How many loved your moments of glad grace,
And loved your beauty with love false or true,
But one man loved the pilgrim Soul in you,
And loved the sorrows of your changing face;

And bending down beside the glowing bars,
Murmur, a little sadly, how Love fled
And paced upon the mountains overhead
And hid his face amid a crowd of stars.

Love Sonnet XVII

by Pablo Neruda

I do not love you as if you were the salt-rose, or topaz,
or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.
I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.
I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;
so I love you because I know no other way

than this: where I does not exist, nor you,
so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,
so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.

If You Forget Me

by Pablo Neruda

I want you to know
one thing.

You know how this is:
if I look
at the crystal moon, at the red branch
of the slow autumn at my window,
if I touch
near the fire
the impalpable ash
or the wrinkled body of the log,
everything carries me to you,
as if everything that exists,
aromas, light, metals,
were little boats
that sail
toward those isles of yours that wait for me.

Well, now,
if little by little you stop loving me
I shall stop loving you little by little.

If suddenly
you forget me
do not look for me,
for I shall already have forgotten you.

If you think it long and mad,
the wind of banners
that passes through my life,
and you decide
to leave me at the shore
of the heart where I have roots,
remember
that on that day,
at that hour,
I shall lift my arms
and my roots will set off
to seek another land.

But
if each day,
each hour,
you feel that you are destined for me
with implacable sweetness,
if each day a flower
climbs up to your lips to seek me,
ah my love, ah my own,
in me all that fire is repeated,
in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,
my love feeds on your love, beloved,
and as long as you live it will be in your arms
without leaving mine

Solitude

Laugh, and the world laughs with you;
Weep, and you weep alone.
For the sad old earth must borrow it's mirth,
But has trouble enough of its own.
Sing, and the hills will answer;
Sigh, it is lost on the air.
The echoes bound to a joyful sound,
But shrink from voicing care.

Rejoice, and men will seek you;
Grieve, and they turn and go.
They want full measure of all your pleasure,
But they do not need your woe.
Be glad, and your friends are many;
Be sad, and you lose them all.
There are none to decline your nectared wine,
But alone you must drink life's gall.

Feast, and your halls are crowded;
Fast, and the world goes by.
Succeed and give, and it helps you live,
But no man can help you die.
There is room in the halls of pleasure
For a long and lordly train,
But one by one we must all file on
Through the narrow aisles of pain.

Ella Wheeler Wilcox

More Pablo Neruda :

Me Gustas Cuando CallasMe gustas cuando callas porque estas como ausente, y me oyes desde lejos, y mi voz no te toca. Parece que los ojos se te hubieran volado y parece que un beso te cerrara la boca. Como todas las cosas estan llenas de mi alma emerges de las cosas, llena del alma mia. Mariposa de sueno, te pareces a mi alma, y te pareces a la palabra melancolia. Me gustas cuando callas y estas como distante. Y estas como quejandote, mariposa en arrullo. Y me oyes desde lejos, y mi voz no te alcanza: dejame que me calle con el silencio tuyo. Dejame que te hable tambien con tu silencio claro como una lampara, simple como un anillo. Eres como la noche, callada y constelada. Tu silencio es de estrella, tan lejano y sencillo. Me gustas cuando callas porque estas como ausente. Distante y dolorosa como si hubieras muerto. Una palabra entonces, una sonrisa bastan. Y estoy alegre, alegre de que no sea cierto.

I Like You When You Are QuietI like you when you are quiet because it is as though you are absent, and you hear me from far away, and my voice does not touch you. It looks as though your eyes had flown away and it looks as if a kiss had sealed your mouth. Like all things are full of my soul You emerge from the things, full of my soul. Dream butterfly, you look like my soul, and you look like a melancoly word. I like you when you are quiet and it is as though you are distant. It is as though you are complaining, butterfly in lullaby. And you hear me from far away, and my voice does not reach you: let me fall quiet with your own silence. Let me also speak to you with your silence Clear like a lamp, simple like a ring. You are like the night, quiet and constellated. Your silence is of a star, so far away and solitary. I like you when you are quiet because it is as though you are absent. Distant and painful as if you had died. A word then, a smile is enough. And I am happy, happy that it is not true.

Love :

Love

Because of you, in gardens of blossoming flowers I ache from the
perfumes of spring.
   I have forgotten your face, I no longer remember your hands;
how did your lips feel on mine?
   Because of you, I love the white statues drowsing in the parks,
the white statues that have neither voice nor sight.
   I have forgotten your voice, your happy voice; I have forgotten
your eyes.
   Like a flower to its perfume, I am bound to my vague memory of
you. I live with pain that is like a wound; if you touch me, you will
do me irreparable harm.
   Your caresses enfold me, like climbing vines on melancholy walls.
   I have forgotten your love, yet I seem to glimpse you in every
window.
   Because of you, the heady perfumes of summer pain me; because
of you, I again seek out the signs that precipitate desires: shooting
stars, falling objects.

Do not stand at my grave and weep,

I am not there; I do not sleep.

I am a thousand winds that blow,

I am the diamond glints on snow,

I am the sun on ripened grain,

I am the gentle autumn rain.

When you awaken in the morning’s hush

I am the swift uplifting rush

Of quiet birds in circling flight.

I am the soft star-shine at night.

Do not stand at my grave and cry,

I am not there; I did not die.

- Mary Elizabeth Frye

"Kiss me, and you will see how important I am."


- Sylvia Plath

Today :

I have don't exactly have anything major to do today. Well, I do have things to do, such as complete reading a few books for class and starting a few papers, but I keep trying to find people to be with. But I don't think I need to be with others today, maybe just myself and some art of some kind. Maybe I'll see what I can do with some words and paper. And continue listening to this fucking fantastic mix of mine.

"Marriage isn't about whether you're singing the exact same melody as your beloved: It's about whether you can find a way to harmonize."

A few good things :

• Got my summer STATs class and it's one day less class a week than previously listed
• Had healthy super food and incredible watermelon rosemary lemonade
• Ran into multiple close friends on campus
• The weather is freaking fantastic
• The barista who I've never seen smile before not only smiled today, but laughed, and we now have an inside joke

Ta-dah!

We are not always the same.

"Live for awhile in the books you love. Learn from them what is worth learning, but above all love them. This love will be returned to you a thousand times over. Whatever your life may become, these books—of this I am certain—will weave through the web of your unfolding. They will be among the strongest of all threads of your experiences, disappointments, and joys."

– Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet

"What a gloomy thing, not to know the address of one’s soul."

- Victor Hugo, Les Misérables

"We might hurt each other if we were together; but apart, we should be hurt much more and to less purpose."

– Sidney Keyes, in a letter, used also as an epigraph for David St. John’s The Shore

"A poem is a frozen moment
melted by each reader for themselvesto flow into the here and now."

– Hilde Domin, translated from the German by Meg Taylor and Elke Heckel

"

the city

sleeps with death upon her mouth having a song in her eyes
the hours descend,
putting on stars….

in the street of the sky night walks scattering poems

"

– E. E. Cummings, from 

"If there be sorrow
let it be
for things undone
undreamed
unrealized
unattained
to these add one:
love withheld
restrained"

– Mari Evans

The perks of being an English major :

"I decline to accept the end of man. I believe that man will not merely endure: he will prevail. He is immortal, not because he alone among creatures has an inexhaustible voice, but because he has a soul, a spirit capable of compassion and sacrifice and endurance."


- William Faulkner

Hope :

It is a wonderful thing to feel and know that I am in the process of becoming.

I think it's safe to say :

I like:

• Responses
• Bombay Bicycle Club
• English & women's studies

Brown hair, brown eyes :

Just for the record, Peet's Pasadena location attracts so many attractive men.

“Faith, in the sense in which I am here using the word, is the art of holding on to things your reason has once accepted, in spite of your changing moods.” 



- C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

Sometimes life, God, surprises you. Sometimes you remember why you're living and that you are a human who is very well alive. You realize you are always of worth, always necessary, not because you thought so, but because others know so. Maybe you mean something to only yourself, maybe just to a soul or two more than your own. It is not because you are able to love yourself, but because there are people there to remind you of your importance, to remind you that they love you. Your existence, it does not go unnoticed. The invisibility, the loneliness, the darkness, the opaque veil that separates us from realizing our own purpose - these are the things that hinder us as we try to be light while all the rest hangs heavy. Rise above, not because you want to, but because you can, not because you cannot, but because you desire to, not because you fear to, but because you are designed to live, to thrive and be on the surface, not below and floundering in the deep.